choices

I have officially hit the 179 marker. 
Still big, but still proud =)

I am more proud of the fact that I have overcome my old ways when facing adversity.  This week I have: gone back to my classroom to work, sat through an overwhelming workshop, and I had a "lady appt" at the dr (you know what I'm talking about....yeah...that.) and by the time I got out of there on Thursday, I was about at my limit of anxiety for the week. After the appt, I went to Walmart to kill some time before having lunch with my husband.  Do you know what items do they sell at Walmart?

CHIPS.
CHOCOLATE.
DIET COKE.

I reached for it all, but put it all back.
now, for most of you that's not a big deal.

If it's not a big deal for you then you do not use food as an emotional blankie, so to speak.
If you do think it's a big deal then you will understand that I just overcame my worst and oldest habit of reaching for food to comfort and console my anxiety/stress.  (*I reached for that clearance rack dress instead! Just FYI, I have a really nice closet after this summer!)

If I would have caved and ate that bag of chips or candy bar, I would have successfully opened the flood gates to commence using the "eating crutch" whenever I felt that way.  I would have eaten the "treat" quickly and secretly.  I would have then berated myself for doing it there by starting the frenzy that would have spiraled out of control.  One bag of chips and any work I have done this summer would have been completely shot out of the water.

and you may think I am overreacting, but I am not.
just one little bag.
just one little candy bar.
just one little choice.

 It's never just one little choice.  Every choice is a big choice.
you just don't realize it at the time.